I have always carried some level of hatred for Spider-Man. It might have begun when he mutated into a giant, pregnant, spider in Spectacular Spiderman #17-20 or the time he killed Mary Jane with radioactive semen in Spider-Man: Reign. Maybe it was when he defeated Sandman with a vacuum in The Amazing Spiderman #4 or when he ate Aunt May in Marvel Zombies: Dead Days #1. I'm not sure where it began but my disdain for the web-slinger has stuck with me for years.

This post is especially dear to my heart because it focuses solely on "5 Times Spider-Man Gets Beaten Up!" with some special bonus panels at the end.

5. In Spiderman vs. Dr. Doom, Dr. Doom and Spider-Man brawl because they are both after the same criminal, Black Fox, who has stolen a jewel known as the Dragon's Egg. The egg was an emerald jewel being held at the Monaco Museum- and had originally belonged to Dr. Doom's mother Cynthia. Doom finds Black Fox and is told that the jewel has already been sold to another party, to which Doom replies "I hope you're lying! For I'll have that jewel... or your heart in its stead!"

Before Doom can make an attack, though, Spider-Man shoots a web at him and instigates a fight... which Doom wins. Spider-Man only lives because he agrees to get the Dragon's Egg for Dr. Doom himself.

4. In The Amazing Spiderman #163 and #164, Kingpin defeats Spider-Man. The story in #163 begins with Spider-Man witnessing the transport of a device and trying to interfere without knowing what the device is or who it belongs to. Spider-Man attacks the thugs in charge of moving the aforementioned device but does not succeed in apprehending it.

Spiderman miraculously discovers that his old enemy Kingpin is still alive and has been drafting a new, dark, plan. The two get into a brawl and Kingpin gets some pretty solid hits in. Finally, Kingpin ends the fight with a poison spray from his lapel which leaves Spider-Man incapacitated.

In #164 Spider-Man is hooked up to the very same device he saw being moved. The machine is called the "Vita-Drain Device" and it is designed to transfer life from one person to another. Spider-Man wakes up and finds himself hooked to one end of the device and Richard Fisk, Kingpin's dead son, hooked to the other end. Kingpin drains Spider-Man's life and brings his son back from the dead. Spider-Man gets away, totally defeated, and is saved at the last minute by Dr. Connors.

3. In Web of Spider-Man #31 and #32, The Amazing Spider-Man #293 and #294, and The Spectacular Spider-Man #131 and #132 all follow a story arc called "Kraven's Last Hunt". The story follows Kraven, a villain known for his physical prowess and his animalistic nature, as he hunts down Spider-Man.

Kraven shoots Spider-Man and buries him alive

Kraven can see that his powers are dwindling and feels the need to prove his superiority- which he does by finding Spider-Man and kicking the crap out of him. Kraven then shoots Spider-Man in the head and buries him. Spider-Man somehow survives the gun wound but is buried alive for nearly two weeks!

2. Dr. Otto Octavius, also known as Dr. Octopus, makes this list for solely for beating Spider-Man emotionally. I know that doesn't sound like it fits here but give me a moment to explain. To begin, in The Amazing Spider-Man #131 Dr. Octopus marries Aunt May just to mess with Peter Parker's head- and it works. Peter leaves a party with Mary Jane just to fight for his Aunt and, when Spider-Man finally rescues her, she passes out at the sight of him.

Okay. I just thought that was worth mentioning. The real reason that Dr. Octopus is on this list has to do with the events of The Amazing Spider-Man #698, #699, #700 and Superior Spider-Man #9.

In The Amazing Spider-Man #698, Dr. Octopus is sick and bed bound from years of doing battle with Spider-Man. He knows that he doesn't have long to live and so orchestrates a most devious plan- to switch bodies with Peter Parker! The plan works and Peter's consciousness is traded with that of Dr. Octopus. In The Amazing Spiderman #700 the real Peter Parker, inhabiting Dr. Octopus' frail body, dies.

No one knows about Dr. Octopus switching bodies with Spider-Man, so people treat him as though he were the real Peter Parker. On top of that, Peter Parker's memories still inhabit his body and they convince Dr. Octopus to become a new, superior Spider-Man. I think this is lame and I would have rather witnessed a Dr. Octopus/Spider-Man combo that was hellbent on destruction... but I don't write the stories.

Dr. Octopus wins for a second time in Superior Spider-Man #9 when he decides that Peter Parker's memories are weak and wipes them from his mind completely- leaving Peter Parker "deader than dead".

Green Goblin from The Death of Spider-Man

1. The Green Goblin makes this list for three reasons: causing the death of Gwen Stacey in The Amazing Spider-Man #121, Killing Ben Reilly in The Amazing Spider-Man #75, and killing Peter Parker in Death of Spider-Man.

The Death of Spider-Man story is a cluster of a battle with the resurrected Green Goblin, looking as monstrous as ever, and the Sinister Six. Spider-Man technically wins the fight, with the help of Mary Jane and the truck she uses to run over Norman Osborn, but he still dies at the hands of the Green Goblin.

The Death of Spider-Man photo from Marvel Fair Use: Comic Covers

Well, that was fun.

It still counts if it is Spider-Man punching Spider-Man, right?

BONUS PANELS! Here are some more still of Spider-Man getting punched, kicked, or hit with things!

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